Don't Forget Your Girl Friends!

Monday , 7, October 2013 1 Comment

My gal pal Sal, and me, on a girl”s weekend in the mountains.
We saw this field of flowers in the road median, stopped the car, and jumped in!

I know that being a mother requires most of your time, especially if you also have a job outside of the home. Without a lot of spare time, it”s easy to let friendships slide. That”s not healthy, though. Girls of all ages need girl friend time!

Do you find it hard to make time for your girl friends? Do you feel isolated, due to busyness? Are you living away from your life-long friends? You need to DO something about it!

As a Mother on the Far Side of Childhood, I want to encourage you to be intentional about staying connected to your friends. Also, I hope you will be open to continually making NEW friends, who share your interests and/or have children your children”s ages!

Girl friends will always be your safety net, sounding board, and support group. They UNDERSTAND what you”re going through, (which is especially helpful when it seems that your husband does not!)

As a newlywed, I was used to having lots of girl friends with whom to shop, eat out, and take trips. That slowed down somewhat while I was working. Then, as a new mother, who lived in a different state from where I grew up, miles away from college friends, and in a new hometown, I missed my friends! I wanted girlfriends with whom I could share “life.”

I tried going to a few different playgroups to meet girlfriends. I hung out with mothers and children from church, but most of the moms were at least ten years younger than I, and at different stages in their lives. I met some great women at a nursing support group, but none who lived close to me.

In desperation, I posted a message on our pediatrician”s bulletin board looking for, “First time mothers over 35 to get together for play dates with our children.” To make a long story short, Sue saw the message and passed it on to her “older” friend, Jean.

Jean called me and we got together with our children. We hit online casino is off! Soon afterward, Jean invited our family to her son”s first birthday party, where I met a group of her friends who had just started a Bunco group. They invited me to join their group.

For the next 13 years, my Bunco Group helped me maintain my sanity when life seemed crazy. It became my “escape” when I needed a little time away from home. It was my monthly night out, my therapy group, my entertainment, and my networking group! Together we went through childhood cancer, babies with medical issues, critical illnesses, the loss of parents, divorce, and a myriad of other family difficulties. We babysat for each other, brought each other meals, and ran errands as necessary.


Bunco Friends. I”m in red in the middle, celebrating with my “birthday twin,” Sue, in pink, on a Road Trip to Florida. (Sue is the one who saw my notice in the pediatricians office. )

The Bunco Girls also had LOTS of fun: yearly Halloween costume parties, Christmas parties, children”s birthday parties, adult birthday parties, shopping, eating, eating, (did I mention eating?), and some GREAT road trips! Even though I don”t see them nearly enough, I know I can still call on my Bunco Friends, and they”ll be there for me!

I have lots of local 13 on TNT; Wednes cancer monthly horoscope at 9)Sean Bean (famously beheaded in Season 1 of “Game of Thrones”) is back in this espionage/conspiracy thriller from the “Homeland”/”24?/”Fringe” crowd as Martin Odum, a deep-undercover FBI agent who spends months infiltrating and gaining the trust of dangerous criminal groups. girlfriends, but I still spend occasional time with my hometown friends. At almost 60, I count my childhood girl friends among my closest friends. There”s something really special about friends who know, and share, your history!

Since our 30th high school reunion, 9 of us have met at a rented beach house once a year to maintain our relationships! E-mail and social media help us stay close. Last week was our beach weekend, and that is what inspired this post! I want EVERYONE to have good girl friends!


I”m second from left. The girls to my left and right, the girl in the middle, and the two girls on the far right, I”ve known most all my life!
The others moved to our Florida hometown in fourth and eight grades. Growing Up In A Magical Place

You may need a safe place to vent. You may need someone with whom to share decadent desserts. You may want to reminisce. You may want to do crafts or hobbies. There are times when you just NEED to talk to someone besides your husband or family. That”s where your girl friends come in! If you can”t BE with your best girl friends, you can always text, tweet, instagram, or Facebook with them! If you”ve lost touch with old girl friends, make efforts to renew the friendships.

Maintaining friendships takes more effort when your children seem to need you 24/7. It requires some give and take. I used to swap babysitting with a friend, so I could have “girl friend time.” Be creative. Spend time with your girlfriends in the evenings, after the kids are in bed, when it”s extra-easy for your husband to babysit. Or, hire a  babysitter occasionally.

You can”t have too many girl friends! I have girl friends in lots of categories: “Childhood Friends”, “Kids” Friend”s Mothers”, “College Friends”, “Bunco Friends”, “Dance Friends”, “Mountain Friends,” “Church Friends,” and even “Online Friends.”

Whatever you need to do to make it happen, I strongly encourage you to find time for your girl friends! Remember: Your girl friends will still be around long after your kids leave home!

I count every single one of my girlfriends as a gift. I am richly blessed!

I pray you will be blessed with lots of girl friends, too!


TRY TO MEET A NEW GIRL FRIEND THIS WEEK! (Let me know when you do!) 

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One Comment
  • […] by BFF. As moms, we rarely take that time for ourselves. My fellow CFF blogger Jamie blogged about the importance of girlfriends a few months back. I agree wholeheartedly with her feelings on the […]

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